When the coffee or wine starts flowing and women feel safe, they stop talking in polite, socially pre-approved scripts and start talking from the deeper recesses of their minds. What I'm hearing in these talks is that we feel guilty. And crazy. And guilty that our kids have a crazy mother and our husband's have a crazy wife and we don't know how much longer we can trick everyone into believing we're balanced. Then sometimes we start to feel comfortable and confident with ourselves and the crazies quiet down and we hear other women talk about the things they feel guilty about and we feel guilty that we are not feeling guilty about these things that are so obviously vital and important since every other woman is worrying about them.
All this guilt is crippling us. It's depriving our families and our communities of vibrant, peaceful, confident women. I don't want my girls to be crippled with needless guilt, so I'm not going to accidentally passively teach it to them. I'm going to actively squash it within me. I understand that other women need encouragement to do the same, which is prompting a series on my blog, Letters From Your Sanity and Happiness.
The first letter seems simplistic. Men may think this is insane. Crafting? Women have guilt about not crafting? I can't even tell you how often I hear this from other women. "Oh, but I can't craft at all, I guess I'm a bad mother." Seriously. Let's stop the madness.
Dear Mama,
You do not need to feel guilty for not doing Pinterest worthy crafts if that is not your skill set. Craft-making is not the mark of a good mother. Your children will survive (and maybe, gasp! thrive) with blank paper, a drawing implement, and their imaginations. You will strive to shun all other forms of contrived mom guilt perpetuated by photoshopped blogs, insecure mean girl moms, and your own crazy sleep deprived mind.
Sincerely,
Your Sanity and Happiness
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